i am a 21yr old male and i just had sex for the first time the other night ad sadly i’d have to say that on the whole it was pretty horrible. i was horribly nervous and obviously had no idea what i was doing. i came almost instantly the first time and lasted just a short time longer the second time. as you might be able to imagine this was horribly embarrassing. right now i am freaking out a lil bit because of how bad i was. what can i do to correct this? any serious help that can help me move past what might be one of the worst experiences of my life would be greatly appreciated.
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Psychological factors such as stress, anxiety, guilt, depression, low self-esteem, and fear of sexual failure cause are the major factors of such type of problem. Your partner can help with gradual development of intimacy and stimulation. Such techniques also can help relieve anxiety, fear and other psychological factors and change the mood. However if you want to increase the time you will have to learn to focus on gradual training and improving mental habituation to sex and physical development of stimulation control. In your pelvic region, various muscles come into play during the ejaculation process. If you can identify those particular muscles and if you can use exercises to develop control over them then you can attain total ejaculation control.
There are some techniques like heart rate technique, breathing technique, training of glans, masturbation and sex techniques. You may find the detail on website given in source:
First off, do not panic. Relax, concentrate all your thoughts on pleasing your partner. The excitement of the first time often causes a very quick ejaculation. If your partner was experienced then she probably was not surprised or significantly disappointed knowing it was your first time. If she was not experienced, she probably did not know what to expect. In either case, you owe her a better experience next time. Again, relax and concentrate on pleasing her. You will be less tense and I promise you will last longer.
During sex, most men begin to lose control of themselves (in terms of ejaculation!) at around the 2 or 3 minute mark – which is usually midway through the first sexual position.
1. When you first feel those telltale sensations in your penis (the heightened sensitivity and energy that let you know that if you carry on doing what you’re doing you’ll soon explode) don’t panic! Too many men are pushed over the edge, right to ejaculation, because they mentally begin to panic when they feel they’re close to orgasm. Panic phrases rush through their heads, like: "Uh oh, I’m gonna blow!" and "Not again, this is going to be embarrassing." Instead of letting these counter-productive thoughts fill your mind and quicken the onset of orgasm, instead calmly say in your head: "Okay, I’m close to ejaculating. Time to use an arousal step-down technique." Then move onto step number two.
2. The most sensitive part of your penis is the top of the shaft and especially the head. To decrease its stimulation (without stopping the ‘action’) slowly and deeply thrust into your partner, as far as you can go and she can pleasurably take.
Then, gently grind your hips, wiggling your pubic bone (the hard area above your penis, about 8 inches down from your belly button) on her vagina. To her, this seems and feels like a wonderful stroke variation, which gives her external clitoral stimulation (the number one way to make any woman orgasm).
However, behind the scenes, it’s momentarily decreasing your stimulation, enabling you to last longer. This happens because when you plunge deep into her, your penis enters a wider area of her vagina, which lessens its contact and stimulation.
Then, to cap it off, you grind and wiggle, instead of thrusting in and out, which further decreases the intense sensations of sex. After 30 seconds or so, your arousal levels will have dropped enough for you to restart your thrusting.
By using this technique, you’re able to control your urge to pop without stopping sex and while giving your partner extra sexual stimulation. Now how much better a technique is that for tackling premature ejaculation when compared to what most people consider to be effective techniques? Things like: "Count backward from 100" and "Think of dead puppies!"
LOL ITS FRED XDDD lol kidding anyway masturbate and youl last longer ow btw if your close to orgasm wait a min or so and continue, lol don’t worry i got the same problem to a min or two after orgasm i can’t stay hard
You just need to relax and calm down, it was your first time, it happens, did you use a condom? that would help and try to focus on her first and then when she is about to c*m then penetrate, you will get better with time, but in the mean time explore with her and have fun, it always gets better with time.